Five Defining Moments of Crosspark 2017

Ben Speckmann

Picture Humboldt Park on a sunny summer day. One Design Company, Firebelly, Someoddpilot, and the Leo Burnett Dept. of Design each arrive with a team of designers, developers, and the most athletic friends each studio can get to sign a W-9. It’s an annual event more contentious than any boardroom battle: the Crosspark Challenge.

The challenge itself is twofold: Compete in field events while simultaneously sipping the official drink of Crosspark, “Blackout Punch.” The winner gets both bragging rights and the sweet, sweet trophy to display in their studio until the next year.

ODC entered the competition with more spirit than a small-town Texas football team. Dressed in blinding tennis whites—thanks, Collin—our eyes were clear, our vape was full, and we couldn’t lose (we placed third).

There were too many highlights to count, but here’s a handful of defining moments from this year’s Crosspark Challenge:

5. #TeamVape

Becky claims she bought her vape just for this event, but she’s really good at “pretending” it’s one of her closest companions. This tool was mainly used as an intimidation tactic: Who wants to mess with the team wearing an outfit straight out of The Royal Tenenbaums and sharing the same electronic smoking device? The entire office might just be hooked on anything Blue Raspberry Menthol flavored now. Does anyone know where she can get her pen refilled? Asking for a friend.

4. “Most Spirited” Sam Rosen

Oh, Sam. So sunburnt, so incredibly happy. We’ve forgotten exactly when he lost his voice, but it was somewhere around the 2 p.m. mark. With six hours to go, Sam didn’t slow his roll, cheering on any team that might increase ODC’s chances at the title. All credit for this otherworldly amount of enthusiasm to the Bad and Boujee/Earth, Wind & Fire mashup—it was stuck in his head from the night prior.

3. Our Fearless Captain Brad Nowack

Brad came to win more than anyone else on our team (well, David came pretty close; see below). First and foremost, his dance moves were unbelievable. The Roger Rabbit? Come on! On top of that—and organizing our team like a champ—Brad took bull from no one in the volleyball match. His antics earned him the Biggest Crybaby award. Thanks for taking one for the team, captain.

2. The Three-headed Noodle Monster

Collectively, our team didn’t have high hopes for the noodle field hockey event. It sounded pretty impossible and we hadn’t had quite enough beer at that point. Good thing Molly, O’Malley, and Bianca made a pact to get beat up, beat other people up, and score some crazy goals so that Pat could make the winning shot in the sudden-death round against LBDOD. They all still have the sore legs and bruises to prove it.

Ben Speckmann

1. David’s Throw-up Pie

Are you grossed out by the title for this one alone? Because we can’t stop seeing it. David—who doesn’t even like pie—volunteered to compete in the pie eating contest this year. We’re convinced that the amount of blueberry pie that made its way to his stomach matched what went up his nose. Despite trying Malört for the first time just prior to the match, he placed second. We’re proud of you, David.

This wrap-up wouldn’t be complete without congratulating Pat and Henock—now known collectively as Team Cornhole—for becoming a dynasty after their third year of finishing first. This year featured a Mighty Ducks-esque finish, with victory snatched from the jaws of defeat in epic proportions. Henock also won the Biggest Bro medal for the second year running. We’re sure he had bro-tastic icewater in his veins.

Feeling like you missed out on the action in real time? Follow us on Instagram and Twitter—you never know when we’ll start training for next year. And now back to our regularly scheduled programming.

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